9.18.2010

How Do You Get Along Sir?

I promised myself this wouldn't happen.
You're like the boys I'd imagine.
The magicians in the movies.

I'm torn between eradicating every trace of you from my life and wanting you to be a part of it.
This isn't even real.
That's how I keep it under control.
I promise myself it isn't real.

I like it best when I'm out of my mind then I can tell you everything.


Olive green dresses, shiny pinned hair, red lips, and pearly white shoulders.
Gold chains.
You're rough. All of the above meeting a jarring black denim and straight jawline.


This is all wrong. Entertaining notions...since when do I entertain notions? I can't even entertain myself.

I hope I can enjoy you for as long as possible. I don't want you to disintegrate, I don't want you to be like the leaves....I want to trust you and I don't want you to change.

But mainly...I just wish I could meet another magician that's so bohemian like you.

9.02.2010

THIS HEART'S ON FIRE

-----AN OPEN LETTER TO THE GREAT ONE IN THE SKY-----------


WHY WAS I BORN WITH THESE EXTRASENSORY POWERS, GOD?
WHY DID YOU MAKE ME THIS WAY?
I WISH TO FEEL NO LONGER. I WISH TO BE FREE OF YOUR AMAZING GIFT.
THIS EMPATHY THAT KILLS ME AND MAKES ME CRY.
I TRIED BLOCKING IT OUT.
I DREAM OF NOTHING BUT MY FILTHY SUBCONSCIOUS DESIRES.
THEY TOLD ME I WAS GOING TO BE A GREAT WRITER, BUT I WAS ALWAYS VERBOSE.
GOD, YOU PUT TOO MUCH EMOTION IN ME FOR ME TO NOT BE VERBOSE.
SO I THANK YOU FOR GIVING ME HYPERBOLE.
THANK YOU FOR THE SHUDDERING SIGHS AND THE VULGAR GESTICULATING HANDS YOU GAVE ME.

I would just like some company that I can feel. I would just like to feel some warmth against my skin. Something to distract me. I understand that it's not time yet. But I would like to meet him soon, if possible.

Thank you.

-----------END LETTER--------------




“To love. To be loved. To never forget your own insignificance. To never get used to the unspeakable violence and the vulgar disparity of life around you. To seek joy in the saddest places. To pursue beauty to its lair. To never simplify what is complicated or complicate what is simple. To respect strength, never power. Above all, to watch. To try and understand. To never look away. And never, never, to forget.”

Arundhati Roy


Would you like to save now and play again later?