jacob
i know what i said
?
in that message i sent you
and I want to take it all back but I want to know how you feel about what i said
because i honestly think you're the only boy who'd make macaroons with me and let me wear frilly dresses and paint murals on the walls at 4am
Well honestly ..we don't know how things will work out
but it's kind of out of control
I don't want to overcomplicate things
and spend our time worrying
instead I just want to be happy and in love
and have things be simple
or try to keep them simple
if we can't, we can't
but until then there's nothing to say that we can't just be wonderful and in love
6:40 PM
you're right
i was freaking out so much after you left in april that I told virg I wanted to break up with you because I felt like nothing was going to work out
but why?
because I like being super committed and serious with my relationships because i will do anything and everything to make them work but there's just too many complications with me and I didn't want to make you put up with that. I was going to break up with you and then not date anyone until I had moved out and then start dating again so I could have a normal relationship where I wasn't such a freak all the time
mom called ... fuck sec
but then I realized I was 20 and you are 18 and I have a very long time in which to
keep going
oh
ok
ok
get my shit together and we could just see how long we can last
even though I dont want to see how long we can last
i want us to last
that's it
basically
oh mern
because i could never find anyone like you if we broke up
you would
and i dont want to
break up with me?
don't
don't even say that
to save you from me
oh shush you're an amazing girlfriend
and you mean the world to me
and save myself some pain
and I'll do anything for you
because I love you with all my heart
so no talk of break ups over stupid things like that
can you just
stop
worrying so much?
like
it's hurting my heart
sometimes
can't we just
love eachother and be happy?
i depend on you too much. you and school are the only stability i have
is that too hard? if there are problems we'll deal with them
no
im sorry
okay it's okay my girl
I didnt used to be like this
I love you
im so crazy
i'm here for you
i love you
and I'll always be here for you
no matter what happens
I'll always be here
my girl I love you so much
you're wonderful
how can you be 18 and be so emotionally mature
i was so scared all day
about tomorrow night
i couldnt eat
or sit still
I know bby
i'd been crying so much that the babies came over and started shoving ice cream in my face and petting my head
my dad said he wold bring me sleeping pills
I'm sorry I'm such an emotionally demanding mess, tell your mom I said hi!
she said hi to you
It's okay mern
stop worrying about us
i'm here to stay
and I love you unconditionally
just let's both worry about you
why are you so perfect?
